Season 4 / Episode 7 / The CW
And you say both cities!
The Flash: Legends of Today featured one of the dopest crossover episodes to date. We got a hell of a lot of setup, a healthy dose of #DatFlash and #DemBows tag-team championship swag, and a nice helping of blood-thirsty badassery in the form of the immortal Vandal Savage, not to mention set up for Legends of Tomorrow!. Tonight’s episode wasn’t as octane-filled or action-packed but it gave us a good amount of dem bows and badassery. Not to sound insensitive, but they kinda went pastry puff soft with this episode’s focus on some personal things Oliver had to deal with. Luckily the writers and showrunners knew not to hold out on battles and action. We are left with a pretty well balanced breakfast episode of insight and craziness.
4000 years ago…
We jump off in Ancient Egypt, four-thousand-years ago. The Priestess Chay-Ara (we’re gonna call Kendra and Carter by their proper names when they flashback to pre-biblical times) and Prince Khufu are up in the royal palace having a pseudo-council meeting. Khufu is the son of the pharaoh. Meteors (or space rocks to simpletons) have been hammering the Earth more and more frequently, so the Egyptians feel they need to appease Horus for it to stop. Prince Khufu does his best with some sacrificial meats and flowers (trifles as she calls them in a condescending tone), but Pops is like, “Son, get that weak shit out my face. Look over at Priestess Chay-Ara, even she knows your offering game is trash.” Homeboy takes offense and presses Chay-Ara on some, “You are actually the one who is supposed to keep the God happy. Y’all just forgot about that and happily jumped on the shit-on-Khufu train huh?” Mid-debate, Savage comes thru and defends Chay-Ara, then warns the Pharaoh of the imminent danger the space rocks pose now that they’ve been striking damn near once a month. Chay-Ara and Khufu run off to talk about how sly her political tongue gab is, and how much he loves it. Savage is creeping in the back taking notes.
The Countryside Haven
After realizing the team ain’t got shit on Savage, they decide to have a countryside Green Arrow/Flash team retreat. They are all throwing out ideas to defeat Savage, then they come up with the idea to create insulated gauntlets to combat the super powerful staff he’s wielding. The magnetic shielding should help them with the staff’s polarity.
Oliver tells Kendra she needs to unlock her powers to be of use and Barry lets her know that Oliver is the worst teacher on the planet. Cisco and Kendra hit the pause button on their ‘talk’ then Carter swoops in. Homie unveils the costume they’ve been wearing in all 206 lives for 4000 years..but she ain’t ready. He knew she wasn’t ready but pushes her to remember the warrior side of her priestess history.
Ollie out here dodging Felicity and the truth that he may have a child.
Ollie out here looking like an old busted Chad Michael Murray stalking his ex boo. He runs up on her and he presses her but she stays true to her story that she miscarried.
FORENSIC SWAG ALERT!! Ollie out here picking up the kid’s dropped hat and secretly grabs a hair off his maybe son’s head. CSI got a new recruit.
The Calm Before the Storm
Malcolm al Ghul calls up Ollie and tells him he set up a meeting with Savage and the big guns in an undisclosed warehouse. At the meeting, Savage strolls out of the darkness with the most intense murderous immortal swag. The team questions him and Savage straight up reveals his entire plan, motive, and capabilities. He wants what every living creature with the slightest bit of intelligence wants — to stay alive. But he needs to kill Chay-Ara and Khufu to ensure he doesn’t die. They are eternally locked in a vicious cycle of birth, death, and re-birth.
Oliver gets bored of this talking shit a moon’s turn ago and straight up sinks an arrow in Vandal’s chest mid-negotiation. He rips it out, Hit the Quan, then gives the team 24 hours to offer up Chay-Ara and Khufu or he will lay waste to Central City…then Star City.
Back at the ranch, Barry runs over to Cisco all worried he just time jumped because he saw himself running next to him a few hours back. He “ghosted” as Barry calls it. We’ll let that slide for the crossover episode. Over here on the Arrow recaps, the Ghosts get capped!
Carter is running after Kendra because she can’t quite handle the hero thing yet. Kendra talking bout killing herself and Carter on that “Become the woman I know you are” get hype shit. Something is holding her back from fully emerging, so he tries to help by telling her to harness the rage she feels as they hawk spar. It was kind of painful, because Kendra clearly ain’t feelin this dude but whatever. Take one for the team right?
Diggle and Thea show up at the lodge and show Felicity that they found a video from 1975 of some professor. He tells them about “the death of the world,” Vandal Savage. He tells the country house squad watching that anything that was involved in the ancient calamity would be capable of destroying Savage. They haven’t quite pieced together what all this means, but it’s like Blue when he has 2 clues. Almost there Blue!
Break out the Kleenex
Ollie on his undercover Maury Povich sneaky DNA test flow, tricks Barry to use his science ways. The test reveals that he is indeed the father of the hair follicle he swiped. He rolls over to his child’s house and they get into helllllllaaaa melodramatics. She forces him to never tell anyone that he is the father and she will allow him to come around and act like a dad.
Felicity presses Ollie upon return to the farmhouse and hellllllllllaaaaaaa melodramatics follow. She basically gets pissed because of trust issues and storms off. Ollie is like, I’M TIGHT, LET’S FUCK SOME SHIT UP! Barry’s like, welp! Guess we suitin up.
Things Get Savage
After all the dramatics, they squad up and decide to go with just The Flash, Green Arrow, HawkGirl, and HawkMan. They meet up in a wonderful warehouse and things pop off REAL QUICK and EVERYYY BODY gets MURKED!! Kendra can’t emerge in battle. Savage beats Oliver’s already agitated and distracted ass. He staff blasts Barry. Knives fly into the Hawk’s chests. Barry gets the gauntlets and somehow grabs the staff and lets it fly as Ollie comes in to help with holding the staff but it isn’t working. Green Arrow tells Barry to run. He’s the only one fast enough to escape the blast andddddddd Vandal drops the atomic hammer on Central City. As I said, EVERYBODY GETS MURKED!!
Barry runs back in time…ya know, so every living human that he knows is no longer dead, disintegrated, burned to ash. He tells Ollie what he did and they decide to go full on butterfly stomping. Hell, nothing could be worse than the last scenario right? He struts off by telling Ollie that he wasn’t SHIT! Straight trash in that fight with Savage and it’s because he ran the paternity test. So guess what? They reversing every damn thing they can up in this episode.
They get Cisco to step in as the one who helps Kendra emerge properly. She couldn’t unleash her power at the original Savage battle and want things to go differently this time around. Khufu’s embrace ya Streets of Rage is off the table. He tells her to remember the priestess side of things, but she still ain’t fuckin ready! Cisco hits her with the nerdy charm.
The Calamity
Back in Ancient Egypt, Savage pulls up on Khufu and Chay-Ara after a little love making. He reminds them that the clergy can’t have relations like this. He tells them that he wants Chay-Ara and attacks Khufu on some…wait for it…SAVAGE SHIT! He stabs homie and the sky rocks begin to fall. He shanks Chay-Ara and they lie dying as the royal palace gets battered with a meteorite hail storm.
They science the shit out of her calamity story and discover that the meteorite crystals that fell during the meteor shower could be used to fix the gauntlet that Barry wears to fight Savage. Barry runs to the nearest museum to steal some age-old sky rock and they suit up.
The Insanity
They roll out to the showdown warehouse, fake the Hawk duo handoff, and go on the offensive. They throw everyone at this non-dying Egyptian scum too. Green Arrow, The Flash, HawkGirl, and HawkMan squad up like no other. They bring the noise to Savage! Speedy, Canary, and Diggle hopping out of vans sending crazy shots and arrows at Savage, but this dude is a deflection specialist and just rips out arrows when they hit anyway. Crazy.
They hit him with mad two pieces then when he’s distracted, Barry Flashes in and snatches the Staff of Horus away. Barry picks it up and his newly upgraded Nth element gauntlet allow him to blast off a dope beam at Savage that he tries to block. Green Arrow jumps in, mirroring what happened before Barry ran back in time, only this time Ollie says he ain’t goin nowhere but staying by his homie’s side. They put all their might into this blast and Vandal Savage is turned into space rock dust.
Victory?
DemBowsBeSoFast rejoices that they have helped Priestess Chay-Ara and Price Khufu finally get a dub in the victory column!! 1-206 baby!! Nobody has a clue what to think. Does this mean that Carter and Kendra are now immortal? Will Savage be reincarnated and come back to life?
All we know is that he’ll be back, because them damn CW commercials wouldn’t allow me to miss a lick of advertising for Legends of Tomorrow! Ohhh yea, we also know that he’ll be back because Malcolm Al Ghul went into the warehouse after the battle and scooped up some if his remains and said, “Now you owe me one.” What kind of sadistic, vengeful, idiotic move is that? HE DID TRY TO BLOW UP STAR CITY THOOOOO, so I guess I’m not that surprised.
Quiver me Timbers!
Malcolm acting like he wants to protect the well being of Thea, threatening Ollie and shit. Bruh, just because you swindled that Ra’s title, doesn’t mean you can’t catch an arrow to the throat.
Kendra went and broke it off with Cisco right after the homie found his first great girl! He gives her a golden GPS as a parting gift, made with the Nth metal, and she plants one on him. Good for you Cisco!
Ollie is the ill liar. Oh yea, he also HATES hugs. At least, it seems he could make a good father, albeit a lying one.
Missed an episode? Read our previous Arrow coverage.
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