Civil War II Goes Minority Report and Iron Man Ain’t ‘Bout That Life?

So I’m at work writing up contracts while browsing on Tumblr, reblogging ways coconut oil helps strengthen natural hair (y’all know who I am) and I see that Marvel released the plot synopsis for Civil War II. Now I’m kinda skeptical, right? Civil War changed the game for Marvel in terms of crossover events. Civil War made sense, it was a solid story, and really tore people apart. Superheroes were divided, mutants were like, “Oh nooooow y’all want to acknowledge we exist and pick a side in this? Naaaah,” and villains were out thriving. There were a lot of consequences and plot threads that made sense in the main title, as well as the crossovers into others’ individual titles. Remember New Avengers 21 with Luke Cage fighting the hero registration literally in his living room in Harlem in front of his whole block? Gold. Peter Parker joining the registration, unmasking, THEN SWITCHING SIDES? GOLD! When Iron Man was fighting Captain America then punched him in the hip? He hit that man with a titanium fist into the hip, dude. That’s a dick move, but… GOLD! Then when Steve Rogers raided the 42 prison? GOLD! Iron Fist telling Tony Stark “I guess you got all 32 pieces of silver now, huh Judas?” GOLD BARS! THIS WAS THE MOST SAVAGE EVENT IN MARVEL HISTORY! I DON’T CARE, I DON’T CARE I DON’T FUCKING CARE!

AND NOW YOU TELLING ME WE GET A SEQUEL? Real shit, I get that it’s mostly to coincide with the Captain America: Civil War movie, but whatever. I’m interested. So back to where we sta…