Game of Thrones Recap: The Winds of Winter

Season: 6 / Episode: 10 / HBO ***Spoilers be gut-stabbed and crawling through crypts with clear health violations***Maaaaaaaan, word is a young up and comer by the name of Al B. Sure Hitchcock once said that you “film your murders like love scenes and film your love scenes like murders,” so we should’ve known yo. We should’ve know that once we heard someone tickling the 88 keys while folks was getting dressed and prepared for the trial that this shit was way too serene to be peaceful. Tommen pouting and don’t want to come out of his room. Cersei drinking wine at 8 am and getting dressed like one of the elder vampires from the Underworld movies and shit. Folks piled into the Sept so they can hear Ser Loras’ confession. Damn man, they got your boy up in here “confessing” to laying with the traitorous Renley Baratheon? During Pride Month? Shit is so savage. Or like, so red state in 2016. Whatever. Loras confesses to a whole bushel of shit and is shown mercy by the court. Mercy being, getting a gotdamn celestial star carved into his dome?

Did he know that’s what the fuck mercy was? I dunno, fam. If I’m getting branded, can I at least pick the fuckin’ design? And y’all thought it was fucked up when Hester Prynne had to rock the Alpha on her chest. Sheeeeeeeyet. I guess Cersei is up next and I’m thinking that ain’t no way before the Mother and the other 6 gods is she lettin’ a blade near her dome man. They lucky they cut her hair without her biting fingers off and shit. Margaery i…