This New ‘Robin Hood’ Trailer Looks Terribly Fantastic

There’s a new Robin Hood movie featuring Jamie Foxx and Taron Egerton that is set to grace theaters in November and it is ABSURD! I can’t figure out if the writers or the director are responsible for this Clint Barton Assassin’s Creed remix, but I’m loving and hating every minute all at the same time. Is this King Arthur with a Green Arrow edge? Man, just watch the trailer. Does thine eyes deceive me? Hawkeye Creed out here disassembling crossbows like Jet Li at The Round Table!? What was that!? There’s just so much. When homeboy leapt out the shadows with multiple arrows in hand, shoots the 1st minion wit a Matrix x Spiderman hybrid move, then SSX Tricky 1080 rotates to the other side and blasts a arrow into the chest of the next guaranteed-to-be-bodied fool?! Ridiculous.

What…what did I just watch? Jamie Foxx is Little John leading the band of Merry Men and mentoring young Robin cats in the Hood? Explosions while the silhouette of a horse rears in in the distance?! Robin out here busting through wooden windows like the Kool-Aid man. This best friend, Mr. Miyagi mentorship is so next level that it slowly develops into a Bloodsport training montage, but only a 2 second montage because nobody can handle that much buff Taron Egerton. You know what else we can’t handle? Another forced love story. Let Maid Marian live her best married life! Fans of the Fifty Shades franchise will enjoy seeing their favorite S&M loving boy toy, Jamie Dornan. They about to be hella salty whe…