Season: 1 / Episode: 2 / Cinemax
Maaaaan, listen. This shit opens with Mac playing Joni recording messages for when he was overseas, poppin’ her lips and shit and other suggestive sound effects a dude might want to hear when he’s away from home. You know what else a dude might want to hear? Any gotdamn thing that proves he’s alive considering Joni’s former affair got his whole upper body pressed. No wrinkles. Paper boy out delivering the good news, but not everybody gonna be able to see the box scores with their morning coffee today fam. He walk up to the garage and instead of this dudes cutlass sitting on 20 inch rims, he sees it sitting on sawed in half human. Joni calling this dude’s crib, but his ghost left the outgoing messages quoting some Still Dre “Feeling like AC Green, chick don’t call here, anymore.”
Mac giving Joni the silent treatment after listening to her mixtape. Joni really just want to know what he knows and hoping that he went and got that vinyl from the store and that’s not his original copy that she loaned to Thelonious Bae.
At the station, word getting round about the death by car+gravity and we get introduced to Detective Tommy Olsen who don’t believe in coincidences and shit. Dude lookin’ for the one-legged man, but his captain ain’t really convinced and tells him to get his ass to Binghamton.
Mac trying to get a hold of some folks and Buddy’s creepy ass pull up to the curb. Buddy got him in the bar tellin’ Mac he couldn’t tell him about about his wife getting the afternoon and evening delight from dude he merked. Buddy trying to give him some insight, but Mac is fed up and just wants from under this shit. Shit is all fucked up because Mac don’t know what Art did with the 30K and that’s the only thing gonna clear this shit up.
Joni added her friend to the “carpool” club to pick up old boy, but HE DEAD AS FUCK, so I guess its time to back that shit up and turn around. Of course Detective Olsen seen that shit.
Ruth in the kitchen doing the baby’s hair, Patty up in her house talkin’ about integrating schools. She talkin’ about once the White kids gotta go to school with the Black kids, the White parents will see how bad the resources are and things will get better.
SHEEEEEEEIIIIITTTTT.
Fam, welcome to the prequel to the rise of private schools. Mac show up like it’s a social call, but you know you’re boy sniffing around like a bloodhound for that missing 30 grand. Well, probably missing 25 grand the way Art was spending that shit at the end. Dude was using $20 bills for coasters and shit. Mac questioning her about loot but Art didn’t tell his fam shit. Or Ruth needs to play more poker cuz her “who the hell said anything about money” face is perfect.
At Joni’s job, they up there praying over Cliff top half and Cliff bottom half since they’re basically two separate people now. Somebody is like, we don’t know why people get taken so early and Joni is thinking maybe she should’ve been more careful about what she was taking and from whom.
Mac been day drinking and pulls up to his pop’s home. His stepmom is there, lookin’ like 80 year candy striper that was preserved in amber for the last 30 years. She apologizing for not coming to his welcome home gathering because she wasn’t feeling well and Mac is like, that’s cool, I only almost died several times and I made it home alive, but that’s cool. Mac up in there showing his natural ass and Susan asking him to leave. Susan calls his pops, but Mac has heard all he needs to and bounces before she comes back.
Mac still drunk driving all over Memphis fam. Had that had been Art, he would would’ve been pulled over about 6 times by now. Mac start flippin’ the fuck out and turning over mattresses and shit like it’s some “forever un-clean” shit. Dude so loaded though, he don’t even get it out of the bedroom.
When Joni finally get home, your boy Mac is laid the fuck out on the floor [still drinking] and playing the vinyls at full blast. Joni help him get the mattress back in the bed room then lock him out the bedroom like he forever banished to the outside world.
Mac [STILL DRUNK] gets back in his car and drives off, still with his tail. Fam, Mac been drinking and driving for a legit 12 hours, yo. Like, that’s commitment. He show up in a “gentlemen’s establishment” and start asking about ole 3 limbs. Nobody know shit though.
Buddy up in the bar doing deals for more weapons, sounding like preparing for war. Buddy trying to get a discount on the snubs and start talking tough till dude lower his price. Dude said he got Buddy a gift, which is a .38 with a pink handle.
Buddy: The fuck is that?
Joe Dawn: A gun with a pink handle cuz you’re gay, right?
Buddy:…give me the fuckin’ gun, b.
Joni at work getting questioned by the police because everybody is like “yeah, Joni and Cliff were mad close. Ask her ALL the questions, officer.”
Detecive like, wait, ain’t carpool supposed to be convenient and save you gas? Why your ass driving cross town to pick dude up?
Yeah….
Joni gotta go to the bathroom and workout the anxiety on that one. She breaking into Cliff’s old desk and retrieve’s a tape that says XX on it. YO, just one X short of getting that NC-17 rating fam. Something tells me she was dropping them mixtapes to Cliff too.
Mac at this wrestling match with The Broker while he’s like, yeah, bout your wife…hate it had to be you fam…but not really cuz that shit works to my advantage. Mac thinks that he brought him here so he could hurt Joni, but Mac still care about her, even though she was getting the deployments while dude was doing his 2nd tour.
Ruth in the diner working her ass off, fam. New brotha in the spot keeping an eye on her and smooth talkin’ when she comes to the table to take his order.
Dude ends up at Ruth’s crib and he might be looking for that 30gs too. Patti come home with the kids while dude in the spot and he slip out the back smooth like…hat didn’t even tilt off dude’s head.
Mac rolls with Buddy to get the guns and everybody kind of antsy. With good reason, Joe done brought some hitters with him because he didn’t like Buddy’s negotiating tactics in the bar. They handing over the guns and Buddy pulls out a knife and gives Joe a set of gills in case he wanted to go swimming…then immediately disregards that when he shoots Joe twice in the head. SHIT IS ALL THE WAY LIVE FOLKS THIS IS NOT A DRILL. The shooting gets started and Buddy catches one in the soft quad meat. Him and Buddy taking dudes out left and right. One jumps in a car and bounces. Buddy sends Mac after him while he go get Lucille from The Walking Dead and takes out the last surviving shooter still in the building. Mac chasing dude down in the are until his prey hit a fucking forklift and gives his car the instant sunroof treatment. So…he’s taken care of.
After dumping the bodies, they meet up with Broker and deliver the guns. Mac is like, y’all going through a bad stretch or is shit AlWAYS this fucked?
Joni comes home and take’s out the Minus one X to be street legal tape. And YEP this shit is straight up lonely on a Saturday special fam. She does the first smart thing we’e seen and rips the tape out. Cuz if Mac had heard that shit? Nah, let’s not even speculate on the possibilities.
Joni listening to Mac’s latest drop while Mac curled up with Gwen from the strip club. Dude got so much game he went to the strip joint and brought home the only woman in that spot that DOESN’T take her clothes off.
Dude that look like he’s been trailing Mac all day show up at the house and it turns out its the one legged man. Joni at the house still but Mac is off getting even with her instead. One legged-creeper knocks on the door and Joni goes to answer.
At night. With all this crazy shit going on. I dunno fam. I got some liquor to pour out for next episode, just in case.
Are you following Black Nerd Problems on Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr or Google+?
Show Comments