An Open Letter To Gohan: You Gonna Stop Being Trash Anytime Soon or Nah?

I– I don’t even know how to begin this because thirteen year old me can’t come to terms with the situation. I was eating cereal watching the new Dragon Ball Super episodes, seeing Goku and Vegeta go beyond Super Saiyan God mode, fight mofos from a different universe, meet the king of all 12 universes, and get the fucking galaxy dragon balls. I’m like, bast damn they’re doing the most, then I noticed two things: one, there weren’t enough raisins in my Raisin Nut Bran cereal (y’all slacking), and two, where the hell was Gohan? Gohan wasn’t around at all? Then I heard it mentioned in passing that dude had a business meeting he couldn’t get out of… *wipes hand down face* Yo, this has been a long time coming and I hate to be the one to bring it up but it’s time someone said aloud that Gohan straight up let the DBZ fandom down. This dude was supposed to be the truth, supposed to take over the rock from his pops, Goku, but it’s like homie straight up peaked in the Cell Games. Gohan’s win on Cell is basically his one platinum hit (with features). My mans was a fucking baby-face animal that’s not a killa but don’t push him!

Gohan was voted most likely to succeed in DBZ and been chilling, making beats for five summers in his mom’s basement. I’m talking “Damn homie, (LITERALLY) in high school/Dragon Ball Z you was the man, homie… the fuck happened to you?” Now if you gonna try and say “oh he got a wife and kid now. He’s a family man.” That ain’t no excuse. He couldn’t dust off the…