• Save

The Quivers here? The Bows here? The arrows here? Well fuck lets get it then. Team arrow is back and wasting no time shutting crime down on the mean streets of Starling City (We’ve officially recognized that these streets are way harder than the streets of Fox’s Gotham). We see the work the team has been putting in over the months as we open up with Ollie doing his parkour routine on top of a semi truck. It may look unnecessary to do a somersault on top of Optimus Prime’s head while its moving but hey… Ollie’s giving you that finesse. Speaking of finesse lets talk about how Roy Harper entered the fray this episode with the most unnecessary parkour move to date, a barrel roll off a car before shooting an arrow.

Roy is NOT about to get shown up this season. He spent too much time on the bench and is all about that draw back string. Ollie takes down yet another villain with his trademark “You done fucked up and failed this city breh”. Back at arrow HQ we hearing reports on how the crime rate is cut down, Thea out taking selfies on an island with Drake, Diggle and Lyla got a kid on the way and on top of all that Detective Lance got that promotion. Lance’s first order of business is to let it be known that starling city fux with the Arrow.

The police are no longer going to be hunting him down. Ollie you made it baby! This is what you was dreaming of back on Lian Yu kid! We Here. We here now!… except the fact that you lost your company, your moms and… well we aint gotta get into all that. Felicity is working in Starling City’s version of Best Buy but she got a plan to get Oliver Queen back on top at Queen Consolidated.

Meanwhile in the D-list underworld section of Star City. Everybody’s favorite drug is making a come back. That’s right. That Vertigo aka V-Go aka Uncut Vertical Fucked Up is new, improved and back on the streets compliments of the new Count Vertigo Werner Zytle. This time around he laced vertigo with that Scarecrow patent and the user sees their greatest fear. …I’m no drug dealer or anything but that seems like really bad marketing to me man. Plus he throwing them into folk’s neck with darts. I’m really not trusting this guy’s direction for business. Oh and he wants to kill the arrow… so there’s that.

Lyla goes into false alarm contractions which has Diggle listening to Mobb Deep Shook ones and you can’t blame him. Dude took on Malcolm Merlyn, Suicide Squad missions, Mirakuru laced soldiers and he is about to raise a daughter? A daughter in this day and age? You know how hard it is for women especially women of color in this fictional and real world kid? Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit Diggle needs to do some more push ups to get his mind right for this shit.

Now we finally get the moment that Ollie & Felicity shippers been waiting for. Oh yeah they are going out on a date. Bye Laurel, By Sarah, Its time for the Smoak to clear the room (see what I did there cause her last name is… YOU DON’T KNOW FUNNY!). ¬†Anyway, at Best Buy Felicity helps out a regular guy just trying to hack pass a security firewall through a keyhole…satellite… I’ma be honest all I heard was lingo from the movie hackers when dude was talking. But he is talking that PC Tech so you know Felicity gotta put him on game for the hardware he really needs. He even offers her a job with someone that could use her set of skills after showing he knows who she is.

Felicity wasn’t trying to hear all that and shows him the best model tech he needs to by and even provides some additional info. After chasing down another goon with the help of Lance giving the perp a flash light to the face before popping some painkillers, Ollie tells him ” I heard what ya said… I fucks with SCPD too”, before making his way towards his date with Felicity. (THIS IS IT GUYS!)

Roy & Diggle: Laaaaawd!
  • Save
Roy & Diggle: Laaaaawd!

This date is about as “will they won’t they” awkward as it can get. They talk about their first time meeting and Ollie remembers the color of the pen that Felicity was chewing. His game is pretty much on Dru-Hill in their prime in this scene. He also tells Felicity that he wasn’t on the island for the whole 5 years. He was at one point in Hong Kong where he had to make some tough choices…

FLASH BAAAAAACK TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIME!!

Ollie is out in the streets of Hong Kong running trying to clock into Barry Allen speeds. He grabbing cellphones trying to call out *YAWK* gun shot to the celly. He runs into the crowd again and tries using someone’s laptop to send word out he alive but NOOOOOOOOOPE. That 56k Modem betrayed him as he got caught by the agent after him. Ollie is taken back and who enters the room? AMANDA THE GOD DAMN WALL WALLER! She enters the room like Beyonce bringing Nikki Minaj out for the Flawless remix. “ONIKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

The fuck you running from Ollie?
  • Save
The fuck you running from Ollie?

[divider type=”space_thin”]
Ollie been trying to run away for months to no avail listening to Big “Ready to Die” cause he don’t give a fuck for Waller’s threats. Waller gives him the “Oh you think you grown now” look before implementing her plan b. Ollie gets knocked out and wakes up int he home of the agent thats been whooping his ass. He learns from him that Amanda will kill his wife and child if he lets Ollie leave.

SNAP BACK TO REALITY!

As Ollie are about to enjoy their pasta with the lobster sauce. We learned that the goon placed a tracker on Ollie. Count vertigo is camped out real nice knowing the Arrow is somewhere in the restaurant. So what he do? Sun, takes out the rocket launcher. Okay, You lacing drugs with shit that makes folk see their greatest fear when they high? I’ll give you that but now you just going to Grand Theft Auto a missile into a restaurant. You are doing the most for those six wanted stars dude.

Shit! Count Vertigo respawned near an RPG!!
  • Save
Shit! Count Vertigo respawned near an RPG!!

[divider type=”space_thin”]
Ollie feeling like he in the DMX “Slipping” video since he ain’t notice the tracker and puts a call out to Lance to get the Count’s HQ. Ollie shows up and gets hit with that Vertigo dart. What does he see as his greatest fear? himself. Count Vertigo then proceeds to whoop Ollie’s ass so bad that Slade is in his cell watching the video feed laughing his ass off. Lance comes in for the save. No time to rest cause Ollie got the board meeting to go to next.

Ollie meets with Queen Consolidated but there is another interested buyer as well. The same dude from the Best Buy store that Felicity helped with the firewall tech. That man is Ray Palmer aka The Atom Aka Mr. Power Point Presentation. Ollie did a great speech about family and trust but Palmer got up there and put that work in with them numbers. Secret numbers he got from Queens Consolidated plus it didn’t help that folks at the meeting were unknowingly rocking watch technology he put out in the streets. Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan Palmer dropped the mic on Ollie’s ass something fierce.

Science is my shit people
  • Save
Science is my shit people

[divider type=”space_thin”]
Ollie is FED UP! He got to deal with wack ass z- list villain again, The dude from Superman Returns just took his company and his ears still ringing from getting his ass kicked by his damn self. Felicity tracks down Count’s crew by their ankle devices and sees they about to blow up a stadium to take out some crime bosses during the fight. Team Arrow gets suited up and ready for war but Ollie is making Diggle stay back. Diggle aint having that shit he aint trying to get his choices made for him but Ollie doesn’t want him in the field as a dad…even against z-list villains. OOooooooooooooooh Diggle mad at that!

“You’d be dead ten time over if it wasn’t for your boy!”

Ollie said, “True that but you staying”. Mean while Felicity had to over hear all that shit with the “awkwaaaaaaaaard” face on.

At the stadium its show down time. Roy diffuses the bomb while Ollie faces off against Vertigo. Ollie doesn’t even try to avoid the dart either. He takes that shit and overcomes his fear with some deep Zen breathing. Sarah shows up to help out as Black Canary. They day is saved thanks to a spinning ax kick to Vertigo as well as a net arrow to tie him up. He yammering about there always being someone else to pick up the mantle but ain’t nobody trying to hear that shit right now.

At the hospital Diggle’s kid has been born. Ray Palmer shows up to apologize to Felicity as well as subtly dropped that someone hacked into all his audio files and replaced them with porcupines farting. I’m not even going to ask why she has that shit on deck cause that’s not my business. Diggle realizes that Oliver was right as soon as he laid eyes on his kid entering the world. They peaced up but Ollie tells Felicity he cant say he doesn’t love her…but he also…can’t…be….with…her? (with a kiss no less) Felicity is not about that wait life tho. Ollie then gets a call from The Gawd Of Speed himself Barry Allen fresh out the coma looking like lightning.

I need some advice... and stop kissing my bae dude. I can see you from the window.
  • Save
I need some advice… and stop kissing my bae dude. I can see you from the window.

[divider type=”space_thin”]
We close out the episode with Sarah talking to Laurel. Their father has been pushing himself more and more since the promotion. He aint built for that desk life he still trying to be out in the field. Sarah doesn’t want Laurel to tell their dad she is in town. She got some shit to do. Laurel tells her to handle that then come thru when she can. They part ways and as Sarah put the mask on she hears that voice calls out to her. Sarah said, “the fuck are you doing here” right before taking 3 black arrows to the stomach! She got rocked something fierce man

Like this but with arrows
  • Save
Like this but with arrows

[divider type=”space_thin”]
To make it worse tho she fell back off the roof and had her back bounce off a dumpster before hitting the ground. All in front of Laurel. She died in straight up Waynes style in a seedy ass back alley man. You know somebody gots to pay for this shit but who? Well if those black tipped arrows are any clue its either Merlyn related or League of Assassin’s related.

Black Canary My Hero I Hate It Had To Be Her.

  • Save

Tags:

  • Omar Holmon is a content editor that is here to make .gifs, obscure references, and find the correlation between everything Black and Nerdy.

  • Show Comments

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

comment *

  • name *

  • email *

  • website *