I Watched The First Episode And A Half Of House Of Cards Season 3, And I Lived To Tell About It.

***(For one brief and holy moment on the day of February 11th, in the Year of our Lord two thousand and fifteen, Netflix accidentally prematurely released the third season of its critically acclaimed drama “House Of Cards”. However, before many of us could send out an email to our employer, telling them that we were coming down with a deeply contagious sickness that looked like it would extend deep into the weekend, Netflix realized their mistake and took the season down. But not before a lucky few of us pressed play on episode one. I was one of the lucky few. What follows will contain no season three spoilers. What it will contain is a minute by minute detail of the most exhilarating and emotionally rewarding hour and ten minutes of my adult life, and when I say that I am fully taking into account my wedding in 2014.*)*** 4:00 p.m. EST – Like any man who has been blessed to live in the age of the internet, I am deeply immersed in what I like to call “The Netflix Wall”. This usually occurs when you’ve literally watched everything worth watching on Netflix, and you find yourself scrolling deep into the caverns ABC Family shows and whispering things like “maybe I could enjoy this. I’ve always rooted for Melissa Joan Hart. She’s never gotten a fair shake.” It happens to all of us. The next step, in this case, is to revisit the things one has already watched, so I start to click on the Friday Night Lights pilot. Because once you’ve watched that thing 8 times, you just lose count…