So you’re black. You love The Wire and Dragon Ball Z. You love Hip-Hop. You hate racism. You’re thinking about watching Game of Thrones. I feel you dawg, I feel you. But I also must warn you, this shit ain’t for the fainthearted son. This is some Get Down or Lay Down type shit right here B. You ain’t runnin up on this show a half-way crook. Na. And best believe I got the keys to getting down with the Thrones.
Should’ve been the first rule, but I had to let you know how real this show is. As for reading articles online, don’t be a fool. The interwebs is filled with spoilers out the ass. Snitches everywhere fam. Im talking The Departed levels of snitchin’. I’m talking Chris Rock’s chapped lips, Pookie levels of snitchin’. I’m talking Fredo Corleone, Henry Hill mobster rat levels of snitchin. Stay away B.
Eventually you’re going to start reading season 1 reviews and such online and start listening to podcasts an shit. Do me this solid, bro… Avoid everything related to R+L=J. Don’t fuckin’ question me. I don’t care if you’re 16 or 62 I’m your damn elder in this scenario and you listen to ya damn elders you cripple (that’s a big Game of Thrones referenced insult to you, not a shot at my handicapped brethren in the real world) Why you ask? Because infidel, it’s the biggest fan theory out there and allllll the sites and blogs talk about it..but usually do noobs a favor and drop the letters R+L=J to stop yo ass from making a grave mistake.
Don’t expect to see much melanin. Plain and simple, ain’t many black folk up in here. Sure after a few seasons we have our regular 2-4 supporting POC characters that pop up here an there, but that’s all. So be ready for the absence of brown skinned brothas and sistas. Gripe all you want, but it is what it is.
So there you have it people. This Black man’s definitive guide to surviving your Game of Thrones binging. This has been my favorite show for the last 5 years and I’m sure it will make it into the top 5 of many of your lists as well. Just make sure you follow these 5 simple rules to watching G.o.T. like a BOSS and you will finally be able to understand why we love the fact that Winter is Coming.