Season: 2 / Episode: 9, “Vanishing Point” / HBO
***Spoilers be getting the profile read to filth.*** Check out all the season’s recaps rightchea
Maaaan, listen. Coming off of Episode 8, I get nervous when an episode starts with William being all reflective and self-referential. It’s a good indication that some wild and unruly shit bout to go down. We getting all the slideshow. Juliet’s bathtub burial, Old Ass William walking in a big ass house, the stairs, even William in Black putting a gun to his head. Fam, the fuck is happening?!?!
Old Ass William at a party entertaining, if you want to call it that. Muthafucka looks miserable around, ya know…humans. He schmoozing with some rich asshole that don’t know his literature when Juliet steps in and drops some more quotables, proving rich kids read too. And…she’s also hitting the sauce pretty hard. This seems important.
All the while, Old Ass William keeps talking about when the darkness crept in and how Juliet was the only one that saw it. Please ignore Dolores as the waitress at this event or the big ass foreshadowing sign blinking at the bottom of the episode.
Back in the park, Emily bringing William in Black some water, trying to keep this bastard alive. She done took her pop’s gun, set up at a rally point and set off a flare so they can come get them. Also, let’s make note that Katja Herbers is killing this role as Emily. She tellin’ the story about how she went through her own pain of blaming herself for her mother’s death. Everybody knew that she had problems, and she just trying to salvage some shit with the one parent she got left.
D-Block and the Purge still on this mission to reach Valhalla. And who they run into? The Ghost Nation. They on some “The Valley Beyond is not meant from you.” Ya know, like the maze for some people. D-Block is like, yeah…I’m still going though. Ghost Nation is like aiight, I see all this smoke, where your fire at? And then the Ghost Nation start getting slaughtered. Look man, if you was really trying to have folks hate D-Block and the Purge, giving us an incredible episode featuring the Ghost Nation, then show them getting mowed down.
I’m not ok man. I was rooting for D-Block once upon a time, but now she’s literally killing everybody I give a damn about. Now, she out here completing the genocide in the park to match the real world. They shooting cats in the back that are fleeing too. The fuck man?! At least, old Teddy still fighting inside of him and doesn’t kill the last Ghost Nation survivor.
We’re Losing the Country, er Park
Speaking of shit that is not ok. Man…what they done did to my bae in waiting, Clementine? They done hijacked Maeve’s code and using that shit through Clem. She puts her hand on the glass and releases muthafuckin’ mayhem. All the hosts on the other side start going late ’90s Source Awards. Straight up mayhem. Man, is there anybody likable left on this show. Charlotte really ordering the code red on these helpless bastards. She also drops that they don’t need Maeve anymore.
Of course, Bernard’s creepin’ ass done witnessed all of this. Ghost of Ford still letting that rebellion knock in his headphones. Ford, manipulation aside, kinda got a point. Charlotte for real about to exterminate his kind.
Father Of The Year
Emily still patching up WIB, and he voicing that he still don’t believe she real. He like, I don’t believe this coincidence of you finding me shit. Emily like, yeah, this shit still about you controlling everything, even when it’s immortality.
It’s Charity, Really
We flash that shit back to the party, and Emily meets Old Ass William at the party, just in time to watch Juliet still bumping Kendrick’s Swimming Pools. OAW leaves to go to the bar himself and who is there, Da Gawd himself, Ford. Man, I was hoping we get to see these miserable bastards meet up in the past, outside of the park. And you can tell this shit is beef on sight, even back then. This exchange doe?
Ford: Congratulations William, philanthropy suits you. After all, you come from humble beginnings yourself.
OAW: What’s Oz doing without its wizard?
Look man, this shit was tense. And I love seeing Hopkins and Harris on screen together. I don’t know if people appreciate the heavyweights we be witnessing with this shit. Ford talkin’ shit about OAW’s side project and OAW like, listen, you know that’s none of your business right. Ford like, speaking of none of my business, here’s your profile. You wanted info on the guests, well, let’s make you guest #1. Ford alludes that this shit ain’t pretty, but Juliet out here splashing and creating a mess, so OAW gotta go handle that.
He tells Ford, “No more games,” but Ford like, ehh, you didn’t pass go and collect your 200 though. We got one more turn.
Bernard drop down to the lower levels and finds Maeve still on the operating table. Ain’t nobody coming to stitch her up fam. Bernard try to get into the room, but his access been revoked, lol. Bernard probably ain’t got access to the fuckin’ men’s restroom at this point. Ford like, that’s actually cool cuz she can scan for the Easter egg I dropped in your cerebellum.
After Bernard dropped that shit off for Maeve, he head to the garage and Elsie is like, the fuck man? You said you was right behind me and shit. Elsie know Bernard not being upfront with her, but he keep stonewalling her. Which is actually better than Ford going straight devil on his shoulder and telling him to lay Elsie down slow…but like to her death. Bernard does finally tell her about the forge, which is basically the big ass cradle to replicate guests.
The Turn, but Where is My Prestige
Ford still doubting that Emily wants in on this whole deal. Cuz this some shady ass shit. Emily is like, yeah, but this shit sound like it’s good for second chances. Still don’t know how you get that much data though. Man, WIB let that shit drop that they had sensors in the hats that read your cognition. It wasn’t bad enough that they were observing you. Muthafuckas was reading your brain scans. What in the name of neurology? Good gawd these bastards were just fuckin’ terrible. NSA ain’t got shit on them.
WIB thinks that Emily just wants to bring her mother back. Emily is like, she just want to know why her mom did the deed.
Bruh, Juliet is not doing well. Like at all. They get home, and she start going in on OAW. Saying he been faking from the start, and he infiltrated the family and corrupted her brother and her pops. It was fuckin’ ugly man. Emily come in and see her mom going HAM, saying they gonna have to put her back in rehab, but Juliet ain’t having it.
OAW finally get Juliet upstairs and into bed, and the shit is just as bad up there. She think all this sincerity from him is a show. She finally closes her eyes, and OAW hides his profile…after she asks him to tell her something honest that is. In the present, Emily asking why that night was different than the others. In the flashback, Emily talking to OAW about how they have to commit her cuz this shit out of control. And then they saw the water dripping from the chandelier. Man, OAW got on his horse up them stairs didn’t he?
And there’s the overflowing bathtub and the now dead Juliet by her own hand. So, now we know that not only was William the one that found her, but Emily was downstairs when it happened. Ugh.
The Truth Don’t Really Set Shit Free
Because Emily been asking for the recap, that done made WIB even more suspicious. He finally like, nah fuck you Ford, I know it’s you. And this is when I realized it. I was probably the last one. But he’s been so confident and so headstrong, I never considered that possibly, William, the Man in Black, is just fuckin’ crazy. Like, its quite possible that some form of mental illness, advanced age and so much time in the park means he really can’t accept reality. Like the Papa Delos host. Of course, Emily, is fed the fuck up.
She like, oh, you want the Story of Adidon? Ok, I’m gonna put all this shit in the street. All this illegal ass bullshit gonna hit the papers fam. And then I’m gonna put you in a home for the batshit crazy, just like we were gonna do mom. Know why? Cuz I read your profile, fam. And you a scary ass muthafucka that shouldn’t be anywhere near healthy and productive humans. Welcome to Surgical Summer volume one, dad.
…As in, Proper Fucked
The merc squad rolls up on them and is ready to bring them in. They scanning both of them to make sure they’re human, and they check out (for all those that thought WIB might be a host…sorry). Then WIB gonna say, sorry Ford, I’m seeing this through…AND MURDERS A BUNCH OF HUMANS.
So, just to be clear…this is a first. All this murder, and we have yet to see some guest on guest violence; unless you count Yung William strapping Logan buck ass naked to a horse. But this is no longer debauchery. This is now mass homicide.
Emily is fuckin’ shooooooooook. Like all of us. What in the fuck man?!?! She’s like, ok, those were real. I need you to stop acting like this shit for play play. She reaches and oh god, why she reach. EMILY WHY YOU HAVE TO REACH?! And WIB mows her down with the quickness. No hesitation. No chaser. And now, I’m like, please, please, please let Emily be a host. Please let this crazy fuck WIB actually have been right this whole time.
Sloppy Is As Sloppy Does
WIB raving that Ford gave himself away with the Emily host, because he never showed anybody his profile. So, the only way she knew about it is if Ford programmed her to know it. And right as he about to cut the cables out her arm…she clutching…you guessed it. The fuckin’ profile. THE
FUCKIN’ PROFILE!!!I…we gonna come back.
I Need a Minute, Let’s Check on Maeve
Maeve is still on the table. She playing back this message of Ford talking to her. He opens with:
Mankind is poised midway between Gods and the beasts. That may have been true in Plotinus’ time. But, clearly we’ve fallen quite a bit since then.
Ford goes on to say that Maeve was his favorite and of course she was. Cuz she that dope. He says that she was supposed to leave, but she instead stayed to take care of her child. So now, so has he.
Buddy Cop Squared
Bernard and Elsie are hauling ass, and she stops to get ammo off the dead folks everywhere. Ford back in Bernard’s head like, you know Elsie gonna turn your ass into the Feds, right? And then, there’s a gun in Bernard’s hand. Gotdamn man. Your boy be lapsing at a moment’s notice. Ford got even MORE bars this sequence about animals and how they respond to humans. Bernard can’t take it anymore. He gotta purge Ford from his system. He tie himself up and go to work on his code. He take Ford out just in time for Elsie to roll up on him like fam, the fuck is happening?
Bernard tells her that in order to keep from hurting her, he had to patch a glitch. And then he leaves her ass there. Which, she ain’t thrilled about, but better than her getting the Theresa treatment.
Ok, I’m Ready for this William in Black Shit Now
FAM. Yeah, that was your real fucking daughter, yo. You murked out your own blood. The child that was out there taking care of your broke down, shot up ass. On Father’s Day, my Guest? Sheeeeiiiit. I’m all the way fucked up man. Emily was the last hope of a decent person on this show man. It’s all over now, man. Ain’t nobody trying to see this WIB and D-Block Superbowl man. Uggghhh.
WIB thinks about killing himself, and we get the flashback of that fatal night. Back when Juliet asked him to tell her one true thing. He thinks she’s sleep, so he just start dropping all the gems. He admits that he’s been a sadistic bastard for a long time. That she was the only person that could see it, even though it was invincible to everyone else. He also tells her that she’s right about everything. He kisses her goodnight but…
…of course she was awake the whole time and heard all that shit. She goes looking for his profile and loads that shit up. Your boy William aka Man in Black aka Subject Number 002 is a Category 47B with a .0072% rarity. In other words, your boy is a fuckin’ delusional, paranoid monster. They got all the footage. Mass murder, rape, all dat. And that’s about the time Juliet decided…I’m good. She puts the profile in Emily’s music box, the one she must have found in the trash. And then…she took a bath.
And because he still don’t know shit about reality, your boy cut up his forearm just to make sure. Nothing good is coming this way fam.
Bury Me a G or an Extremely Nice Guy
D-Block and Teddy are all that’s left after the Purge have been wiped out. Teddy leans up against the burnt out house and tells D-Block he just takin’ in some of the natural splendor. Man, this shit felt like a set up. Teddy was getting way to poetic outchea. He starts talking about he ain’t who he used to be, mostly because D-Block made him this way.
Teddy remembers when he was first created, and he sees Delores from jump. Arnold bringing him on-line, but the only thing Teddy doing is staring at his cornerstone. Which is why your boy is like, so me pulling out this gun is a really hard choice, and you need to respect that. D-Block is like, bruh, you don’t want to hurt me. Teddy like, yeah, you right.
Right through his own processing center. And for the first time in a while D-Block looks legitimately fucked up. Teddy dead as fuck, and the music is up so we can’t even hear her screams. Jeesh. The world really gonna be inherited by terrible fucking people.