Cyber Street Fighter: Dhalsim Teaches You “Roasting”

Welcome to the first installment of Cyber Street Fighter, where the famous street fighters of old teach you how to Internet correctly. Today’s lesson will be on Roasting. Who better to teach it than the master of dem flames himself, Dhlalsim? No one. Take your shoes off at the door, step into the dojo, and let go of your earthly desires as class is now in session. Ah, yes welcome friend. I am Dhalsim and this is the art of roasting. Now make no mistake — roasting is an art. For those of you unfamiliar with the term, roasting is the evolution of the game titled the dozens. The objective is simple: you sling insults back and forth until one person gives up. Also note that if you get upset, you lose. If you don’t respond in an timely manner, you lose. You gotta be quick, witty, sharp with the execution in person, but even more so if we are talking about being online. Especially if we are talking about Twitter. If you’re engaging in a roast you need to make sure you’ve got a solid stance.

Notice the fingers! Constantly moving, constantly ready for the drag. The hands are ready to be thrown via mobile phone from this upright stance position. The legs are bending giving you support for whatever heat your opponent may throw back towards you. This is where your brace yourself for what’s coming and get ready to dish it back out as well. A key element in roasting is movement — you can’t keep roasting someone by only focusing on one specific thing the entire time. You want to stick …