Preacher Recap: ‘The Last Supper’

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Season 4 / Episode 2, “Last Supper” / AMC

 

Welcome, To Jurassic Petty

The most #Ungodly show on TV returns with…God. We start in prehistoric times, with G hyped to show off his ‘latest creation’: the brachiosaurus! It’s a wonderful and majestic moment, just a deity reveling in the nature they designed. Then, said dino drops the biggest deuce in prerecorded history. Why did Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg put us through that? I don’t know. It doesn’t matter, because right then the first ever double rainbow cascades across the sky. God is so hyped right now, he marvels at the rainbow he made, looks back to the brachiosaurus just in time to witness it EAT ITS OWN CRAP. So much for ‘life finds a way’. God gets so tight, so heated, so disappointed with life that he goes Thanos with the gauntlet on and calls down fire from the heavens! He murders everything. On God.

Roll Opening Credits

These Boots Were Made For Walking

We catch up with Jesse hitchhiking to the airport. He’s riding shotgun with a sage and retired porn star driving a chicken truck. As weird as that sounds, it gets stranger as Jesse keeps seeing Tulip in place of the driver. The truck passes a kid on the road, crying over his dead dog. Homegirl in the truck cracks a few off-color jokes, and Jesse gets all the way up on his high horse and uses The Word to make her stop the truck. Turns out the kid’s a thief. Tells Jesse he’s ‘deadass’ about taking his stuff. (Where the hell are we? The truck driver sounds like she’s from Texas. This kid has a New Zealand accent. Ain’t we in the “Middle East”?) The kid pulls a gun out, Jesse pulls out The Word and makes the kid drop the gun, which goes off and kills the dog. Now the kid is crying for real, and the chicken truck done pulled off. Jesse feels bad now, so he gives up his wallet and his boots. An airplane goes by overhead. Jesse sees a guy riding a camel, and smirks.

What New York Used To Be

Cass recalls the old New York with Frankie Toscani, it’s a pretty heartfelt story. All the way down to the old days at McSorely’s (a dope Irish bar that actually exists) drinking with some NYC legends. Then, he issues a very specific threat to his captor. Class starts in Advanced Torture day two.

Knocking on Heaven’s Door

Back at the Masada front gates, things are pretty chillaxed. There’s a guard doing his thing, minding his own business, until he makes out the sight of a rocket heading his way! The camera follows the smoke back to Tulip holding an RPG and some binoculars. Looking disappointed the rocket ain’t even dent the door. She jumps in the whip and heads out.

Back At It Again With The Red Vans

Cassidy is doing his bid like a G. After the threats he’s back in his cell with the tortured angel he’s affectionately dubbed Birdman. Birdman is doing his schtick while Cassidy BITES OFF HIS OWN FOOT to slip his chains! When the guards see his chains, they come in and Cass takes them out real vicious like. Birdman is impressed. Cass limps out and corners a Grail trainee in a room labeled ‘Urban Blight’ (filled with floor-to-ceiling shelving with nothing but hard drugs) and backs him down.

A Little Song, A Little Dance, Batman’s Head On A Lance

Agent Featherstone seeks out Tulip at the Bar & Grail. The proprietor is a day one for the #Ungodly squad and doesn’t give up the info. Featherstone pops one of her own soldiers to make a point. The proprietor heads to a little garage across the street where Tulip is fixing her car like a boss. She does a brilliant assessment of what her car needs and it’s fucking poetry, because, Ruth Negga. Tulip knows Jess isn’t coming back and says so.

A Bad Joke Gone Wrong

Jesse’s camel rider has beef with another camel rider. It has the makings of a politically incorrect joke; a Catholic, a Coptic and a Muslim argue in the Arabian desert. These dudes is really arguing, like, the sun shifts positions in the sky and whatnot. The Coptic guy pulls a sword and the Muslim dude pulls a gun. Jesse gets fed up and uses The Word to force the Coptic guy to forgive the Muslim dude. But he only tells the Coptic guy to forgive, so the Muslim dude takes the incoming hug as a threat, pulls out a gun and shoots the Coptic guy. This causes the Coptic guy’s sword to impale his own camel in the neck. Which causes mad blood to project into the Muslim dude’s face, which shocks him into shooting the gun…Into his camel’s head. The newly dead camel collapses onto the Muslim dude, killing him. It all goes to shit pretty fast. Jesse still ain’t got no shoes. Jesse asks the Coptic guy why it didn’t work, apparently, the Muslim dude didn’t speak English. Another plane goes by.

You Call This A Coronation?

Starr is officially the All-Father, his coronation is small with a few heads of state in attendance. They check-in and ask about the whereabouts of the messiah, Humperdoo. Which if you recall from the end of season three, he and all gazillion of his clones were released into the world by Jesse.

Cut to: Grail soldiers corner Humperdoo out in the tall grass somewhere. They play some soft shoe music and give him a cane (don’t make me embed a gif of why). Humperdoo simply humps the cane. The Grail soldiers put a bullet in him and place him on a gigantic pile of Humperdoo bodies.

Back to: Starr’s coronation, the rep from New Zealand is talking a little reckless to the new All-Father. They put him in a box, with a cooked grenade. The rep asks that his browser history be wiped. Boom.

Meanwhile, Cass fights the urge to ingest every drug in the room and makes his way all the way to the front gate. Only to have it open on the desert sun. He has an immediate change of heart.

At the Bar & Grail, the proprietor tries to convince Tulip that storming Masada to save Cassidy is a ‘bad job’. You know damn well can’t nobody convince Tulip O’Hare to do nothing she don’t want to do.

Escape Plan 5: Is We Is Or Is We Ain’t?

Later in the day, Cass slips out of Urban Blight and back into the elevator toward the exit. He’s looking rather twitchy and has the heroin equivalent of a milk mustache under his nose. He makes a little scene on the elevator which sucks because he’s on the elevator with Frankie Toscani and a few of his students. A tussle goes down off camera and Cassidy emerges from the elevator in rare form: a cloud of coke dust and shot the hell up. Frankie walks off the elevator triumphant.

Cut to: Jesse makes it to the airport. Finds out that the rock formation from his nuclear kill-fantasy dream is in Australia. Cue B-Roll of Australia. Jesse uses The Word to make smoking in the airport legal and realizes he doesn’t have his lighter. His only lighter. The lighter left to him by his father. The only thing on Earth that is important to him other than Tulip (although, it’s a close race). He recalls that he left the lighter in the chicken truck. The truck’s logo read Jesus De Sade.

She’s A Demon On Wheels

Distraught with the idea that Tulip is going to get herself killed, the Bar & Grail proprietor calls Featherstone and gives up their location. They think they close in on Tulip in a fleet of Fiats, but she gives them the slip in the ’72 Chevelle. Tulip is giving them this work like John Wick in the Mustang. She takes all six cars out, one by one. Saves Featherstone for last in a game of chicken (Featherstone loses, obviously) and simply drives up a hill – where a Fiat can’t go. Game: Tulip.

You Do It To Yourself

Back at Grail University, a student tries their hand at peeling Cassidy’s nethers. Frankie does a psychological assessment of Cass and identifies that guilt for his bad deeds locks him into a never-ending loop of self-imposed suffering. Cassidy believes he deserves to be tortured.

Jesse arrives at Jesus De Sade, commands his driver to ‘wait for him’, sees the truck, grabs the lighter and attempts to keep it pushing. He makes it back to the car just in time to see a child dressed in colonial garb be creepily grabbed up by someone. Jesse heads inside.

At Masada, Starr is getting an ear replacement put on and it looks like a pork tenderloin is stapled to the side of his head. I’m convinced he will never get a break; I’m also very cool with that.

I’m In.

The EMTs are picking up the Grail soldiers from the death race pit Tulip trapped them in. Peeping all the hullabaloo from afar is our friend, the Bar & Grail proprietor. Watching over Tulip’s car and rocking her Ferrari hat. Back at Masada and pissed off, Featherstone waits for an elevator beside a gurney with a suspiciously familiar-looking blonde on it. Camera pans to a smirking Tulip laying on the gurney, facing away from Featherstone as the gates to Masada close behind her.

Cut to: Jesse with all the leg room a plane could offer while smoking in flight like an extra in Mad Men. Camera pans to see Cassidy across the aisle from him, reminding Jesse that he’s left both his friends behind. The PA system chimes and the pilot lets us know it’s sixteen hours to Australia.

You Are A Child’s Plaything

We pull back from the plane to see it’s actually a toy. On a table. Alongside another toy of Tulip’s car, a toy of Jesse’s Angelville coffin, a toy of Jesse’s church in Annville. The sound of jazz, and the fraught and thoughtful visage of God himself deciding how to make Jesse suffer next. Episode ends.

 

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  • Frantz Jerome

    Poet, MC, Nerd, All-Around Problem. Lover of words, verse, and geek media from The Bronx, NYC.

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