Star Wars: Force Awakens Teaser Trailer #2

No, no, hell naw man, you cannot do this kind of shit with no notice. A brotha can’t even enjoy his lunch break and eat his overdone turkey club sandwich with the bagel a little softer than he would like without some new damn Star Wars dropping in the middle of it. Y’all ain’t shit for this one LucasArts. Now I’m up on the job, cursing the slow ass complimentary wifi for buffering my euphoria and somewhere there’s a IT tech watching me hold my phone 4 inches away from my face and saying, “This is why we can’t have nice things.”

(Deep Breath)

But you know what LucasArts, I forgive. Bless you for this new trailer that feels straight out of 1984 and bless the hands that prepared it. Bless Mark Hamill Da Gawd of voice overs and the robotic laying of hands on R2D2. Bless the best sci-fi shipwreck scene in modern history and decaying soul of Vader. Bless the lightsaber and the metaphorical passing of the torch. Bless the light that emits from it, even when the color is of dying suns. Bless the Force, my god bless the force push and the storm trooper army and the callback of storm trooper disguises.

And blessed be the Millenium Falcon and the pursuit of morally ambiguous men and wookies alike and the lasting irony of Harrison Ford flying anything right now. In the JJ Abrams name we pray.

Amen.

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  • William is the Editor-In-Chief, leader of the Black Knights and father of the Avatar. With Korra's attitude, not the other one.

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  • Draper

    I figuratively CANNOT WAIT! I love that it’s Leia handing off the lightsaber. The original series never saw fit to train her as a jedi, despite her having the same potential as Luke. And if she’s handing it off, does that mean that she’ll be a master and have a padawan? Also, Luke talks a lot about the force and his family. We know that Han and Leia have a thing. Are we looking at the next generation of Skywalker?!

    Of course I’m also excited about John Boyega. Can’t wait to see the roles of Lupita and Gwendoline. Really hoping that one of them turns out to be Sith. Just…too much awesome.

  • Draper

    Having calmed down a bit, there is significance in the handing off of the lightsaber that we might be missing.

    1) the lightsaber is being handed off, not constructed. This is similar to how Luke got his first lightsaber, which was a family heirloom.

    2) Look at the actual lightsaber. It looks like Luke’s 1st lightsaber, which was Anakin’s. Really considering the 3rd generation Skywalker thing.

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