Oh, I’m gonna let you know right now that the i’gnant is about to be too damn high. I been waiting to hop on the track about this shit here. I been waiting for this since Miles Morales got drafted into the 6(16). I been needing this since Bendis had Miles talkin’ that “I just don’t see race” shit in his Spider-Man series. I been fiending for this since Steve Rogers flashed Hydra gang signs. Lemme calm myself. Good Lawd, lemme calm myself ’cause I’m charged up right now. I’m charged up.
Editor Will Evans already addressed the significance behind the cover image of Kamala Khan ripping apart a poster of her idol Carol Danvers on that “never meet your heroes” type shit. But this cover right here? This cover right here with Miles Morales on top of Steve Rogers about to drop that shield on ’em like Miles ’bout to get Steve’s line-up to look Picasso perfect for the fade? This ain’t even on the same plane as Kamala and Carol. We don’t even know where either of them stands, just that they’re on opposing sides, and that’s all the fuck I need to know. This shit goes so hard because if we’re putting Civil War II to the side of the issue, they got Miles out here scrappin’ for the spot. Miles is literally taking the rock from Rogers and about to yam it down from the paint.
Akin to when AJ Styles (FINALLY) came (back, technically) over to WWE and was taking it to Roman Reigns, this cover represents the changing of the guard. Miles is one of the heroes that represents the new legacy in Marvel. That’s what’s got me dumbin’ out right now. That’s what got me back on my New Jersey Drive bullshit. Don’t even come up in this piece if you’re butt-hurt over my joy with this. I don’t wanna see anything about “Oh he’s just happy because a Black boy is flourishing–” YOU BAAST DAMN RIGHT I AM. Again, putting aside what this cover represents for the actual story line of Civil War II, you gotta understand I’m so against the authority. I’m so anti-establishment and pro-underdogs disrespecting the dress code.
I fucks with Steve Rogers heavy, but this is about what he represents. Steve represents the ideology of the American Dream, and America ain’t really the underdog, fam (much as we want to believe we are). That American Dream hasn’t had the best buying price for a lot of people, and this cover, to me, *gets up from computer and does high knee drills* I SAID DIS HERE COVER, TO ME? This is Miles Morales cashing in on that American Dream (WWE money-in-the-bank style) so he can redistribute it at a discount price.
*DEEP INHALE*
MILES MORALES LOOKIN’ LIKE HE FREESTYLIN’ OVER SWAY IN THE MORNING’S 5 FINGERS OF DEATH ALL OVER STEVE ROGERS’ CREDIBILITY!
Miles looking like he ’bout to dead “not my Captain America” talk.
Miles looking like he serving Steve Denny’s Early Bird retirement special.
Miles looking like he ’bout to hand Steve Rogers the severance pay, pink slip, the life alert.
Miles looking like he caught Steve flashing the wrong gang sign for Hydra.
Miles looking like he coming for Cap’s cap.
Miles looking like he fed up being Bendis’ mouth piece for “progressive” race views from the landfill.
Miles looking like he ’bout to Super Smash Bros Steve with his own controller.
Miles looking like he ’bout to retell this shit in a Charlie Murphy voice sayin,
“I CAME DOWN WITH IT LIKE THIS! SO IT HURT MORE.”
Miles lookin’ like he reciting the whole hook from Ether.
Miles lookin’ like he couldn’t find a mic to drop so Steve’s shield will do.
Miles lookin’ like he ’bout to do it for the Vine and the culture.
Miles lookin’ like he was going to reconsider but someone shouted “WORLD STAR!”
Miles lookin’ like he been waiting to go CM Punk pipe bomb on Steve, saying, “Steve Rogers while you lay there hopefully as uncomfortably as you possibly can be, there’s something I got to get off my chest. I don’t hate you Steve, I don’t even dislike you. I hate this idea that you’re the best. Because you’re not…”
Miles saying, “My Captain America Black and his shield is round.”
Miles saying, “LOOK AT ME, IRISH! I’M DEE CAPTAIN NOW.”
Miles saying, “That’ll do pig. That’ll do… I’d quote Old Yeller but I was born in the ’00’s.”
Miles saying, “Hail Hydra, right?! Then rep yo set then!”
Miles saying, “ON YOUR F’N LEFT.”
Miles saying, *while shaking his head*…
Steve Rogers thinking, “I didn’t get iced for this shit.”
Steve thinking, “No no no wait, my best friend is Black.”
Steve thinking, “Oh my, Chris Evans, here comes the 187.”
Steve thinking, “Trust us, they said. This sharp edge on the shield will be cool, they said.”
Steve thinking…
Steve Rogers ’bout to go into that void.
Steve Rogers ’bout to limbo all the way down to limbo.
Steve Rogers ’bout to walk into heaven and see Bill Foster and Rhodey playing spades at a table and he’s gonna look for a seat and Bill gonna say, “yeaaaaah, there’s a shortage of chairs sooooo….”
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Show Comments
Tyrone Westonson
Yo lmaooo this what I come to this website for, this right here homie.
Kevin Betou
Haha the “whole hook from ether” killed me
VyceVictus
lolol Lordhavemercy “Steve thinking, ‘No no no wait, my best friend is Black.’”
bye-ez
i loved this lol
Rontanamo Bae (@WheresRonald)
Glorious.
Darko
Great article. Great cover on that comic. Question for you guys. Abraham Attah cast in Spiderman. Miles Morales or no? Perfect age and the kid can act!
JameriCANE
DEAD! Cap resurrected and merk’d in the same month…
Matthew Taylor
This whole shit… My exact feelings when seeing this cover. Great article.
Samuel Freeman
This is awesome!