Channing Tatum is Gambit and the Marvel South Will Rise Again

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We are nothing without our people…

Yo, it’s Comic Book Movie Weather for the next decade so there is ALWAYS casting news. But this ain’t casting news fam, this is wish fulfillment. Your wish, though?

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(insert maniacal laughter here).

Naw b, it’s Channing Tatum’s world and we all just the tear away pants from Magic Mike, living in it. Best we can hope for is a clean button rip and being thrown into a thirsty woman’s lap with disposable income.

What seemed funny at first (as in haha) when Tatum announced that he wanted to play Gambit, now seems funny (as in laughing to stop from crying) that it is a living, breathing, pelvic thrusting, thing. And this isn’t to say that Tatum is a bad actor, he’s not. And this isn’t to say that there haven’t been worse actors in a X-Men film. There have been. But I would much rather see Tatum fit into an ensemble cast then see your boy rocking a head band and bo staff with a pack of Bicycle 52 in his trench coat as the “feature.” And being an X-Men identified character, this movie is of course being made by Fox which has brought you such classics as Jessica Alba running around naked but invisible and Toby Maguire as fuck boy Parker in the third act of Spider-Man 3.

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Come on, you know Channing Tatum has said this in at least five films already.

Let’s be honest, Tatum wants to play Gambit, not Wolverine or Magneto, so we can’t set the internet ablaze over this like our first instinct is to. But yo, Tatum rocking a Cajun accent might be the best gift to Shade-benders like myself since Halle Berry tried to embrace Mother Africa with a dialect that could be classified as “carnival background noise” in X-Men. Unless Tatum is actually British and can do any United States associated dialect under the sun. I mean for the love of kinetic energy, his name is Channing after all.

I guess what’s most significant about this is the notion of asking for something and getting it. It’s smart on Tatum’s part, because I don’t know what casting director for an X-Men film is calling up 26 1/2 Jumpstreet for a random Gambit role in a future film. While many of us would definitely have liked to see Gambit reappear in an X-Men flick (to at the very least atone for the midair collision that was his portrayal in X-Men Origins: Wolverine), I don’t know how many cats were waiting on the Gambit solo flick. I mean, I fux with some Spades and a little Poker, but I’m not sure Le Diable Blanc is Player One status.

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The Bayou’s Favorite Son

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But I have to admit, its admirable that we’re getting a Fox comic book flick that wasn’t conceived for the sole purpose of remodeling their board of trustees’ vacation homes or kicking Marvel in the nuts. So, as ridiculous as this whole project is, ironically it’s actually a bonus for us X-Men riders that we’re getting an affiliated flick at all. But not like a Christmas Bonus, where you can drop that extra four hunned for a XBOX One. More like, your boss handing you an envelope marked “Bonus” at the end of the year that contains a $25 gift certificate to Honey Baked Ham. And the fam went vegan like 6 years ago, b.

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  • William is the Editor-In-Chief, leader of the Black Knights and father of the Avatar. With Korra's attitude, not the other one.

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  • Ashley Stevens

    I would have loved to see Michael Raymond-James (Rene from True Blood/Neal from Once Upon a Time) as Gambit. Why? He can act, he’s pulled off a Cajun accent before (see True Blood) and he has the charisma. He’s one of those guys that at first glance you may be like, ‘he aight.’ But when he starts to act and that charm starts flowing you go from ‘he aight’ to ‘damn he’s fine!’ That’s just my two cents.

  • LeValkyrie

    I’ve always thought that Gambit was the inspiration for Sade’s Smooth Operator. Hey, in my mind, it’s totally plausible. When I think of Gambit, I don’t think of Channing. Point. Blank. Period. Channing’s too much of a preppy jock to pull over the calculating, manipulative, and chameleon-like character that Gambit really is. Not to throw shade because I do like Channing, but there are several other actors who could have nailed this role including Josh Holloway from Lost, Alexander Skarsgard, or even bringing back Taylor Kitsch. He wasn’t really that bad as Gambit, there were several flaws in the movie as a whole. With some reinvention and upgrading he could have been fine. I think the Channing cast was a simple case of choosing someone popular with a big fan base; however, they’re determined to do this, so let’s set up some ground rules:

    1) Red on Black Eyes (They completely forgot that in that debacle that was XMen Origins)
    2) Speaking in Third Person
    3) A Real Cajun Accent and some Creole (Channing, get your weight up. Realize Cajun is a dialect, not a language boo)
    4) Cherie, Mon Cher, or Mon Ami at least every 5 lines
    5) All the slight of hand, card tricks, and bo staff wielding known to man. And his card throwing better be top notch.

    Whew, glad I got that off my chest.

  • Ed

    Channing ain’t dumb. He is cashing in while the gettin’ is good. Plus he figures maybe down the road they’ll want Gambit in some other flicks and poof, mo money mo money mo money.
    Odd thing is, I saw an interview a long time ago where he was discussing his ‘woodsy’ background and upbringing. His folks come from the sticks, so the story goes. So maybe this is him cashing in AND getting back to his ‘roots’. I almost said that without laughing.
    However, check it. Here’s what Marvel should do. Make this one an R movie. Since you’re using Channing for his beefcake mainly, go ahead and just let him hunt for bad guys in New Orleans, Rosario Dawson can fill in for Lisa Bonet (nipples anyone?), Nick Cage can fill in for Mickey Rourke AND Robert DeNiro (he’s not that good but he is that crazy). Throw in some poker, kinetic energy sex, red eyes blazing in a dark alley during Mardi Gras and you’ve got 50 Shades of Grey, Cajun Style.
    Or, do the smart thing. Get Norman Reedus and pay him whatever he asks and he can moonwalk thru that movie in his sleep.
    I dig Channing. I really do. But he is about to learn that Hollywood forgives, Comic Book Nerds don’t.

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