Season 6/ Episode 7 / NBC

[quote_simple]“Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,
And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind..”[/quote_simple]

We start at the end of the episode. Monroe is declaring his love for Eve. Nick is pressing up on Rosalee. Adalind is tryna out her tongue in Monroe. Eve tells Nick that he’s the only one for her. [audible sigh on that last one].

36 hours earlier…

Creepy hellspawn wakes up Eve to essentially troll her for being lowkey and silently sad that Nick’s not her boyfriend anymore. Why hellspawn, why? She was peacefully asleep and probabvly dreaming of the house she used to live in with Nick before your mom raped him and you woke her up to pour salt into that gaping wound? Diana stay horrible.

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Speaking of horrible, Diana is on some “I miss people, too. Like my old mommy, Kelly. Do you know where she is?” Annnnd that’s when Eve starts flashing back to the special delivery that Nick got straight Kevin-no-fingerprints-Spacey-in-Se7en style. Welp. Then Adalind interrupts this tender moment to tell Diana to get packed for her weekend at her Dad’s. Getting ready includes a talk about how it is absolutely okay to keep secrets from her dad. For example, don’t tell him about the cryptic symbols on the magic cloth and in the tunnels.

Meanwhile at Casa de Monrosalee, Rosalee surprises Monroe with a weekend getaway for his birthday; they’re meeting Nick, Adalind, Eve, Hank, and Wu at a fancy-schmancy hotel.

While Adalind is dropping Diana off at Renard’s, Eve is taking a shower and crying, I assume. She gets out if the shower and is doing that normal post-shower stuff in the mirror when the mirror begins to… morph. There’s an electrical storm and a Skeletor head floating in the middle of it. So she does what any heartbroken hexenbeist still wet from the shower and in only a tower would do: call out for her ex-boyfriend. It disappears [inflection goes way up at the end of that sentence].

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Eve tells Nick that the storm looks like what she saw while she was in the deathgrip. Then they make the executive decision not to tell anyone. [Looks at camera] when has that gone well? For anyone? Ever?

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At Renard’s, Diana is off doing Diana stuff: making cookies for breakfast, drawing ancient celestial symbols, telling her manipulative-ass father that they’re a secret that mommy told her not to tell (and that they’re in the tunnel), and getting kidnapped (…again).

I gotta be honest: my favorite part of this whole episode is when Renard comes back in and realizes Diana has been kidnapped. My dude is frantic. I wasn’t. Then he joins me on TeamDianaIsEvilAndSheGonnaBeAight.

You know who isn’t gonna be alright? Anyone who hangs out with Nick. Turns out that the son of a man Wesen that Nick put in prison (before his Grimm puberty/awakening) is a waiter there. So… he puts a spell on Nick and all his friends — except Rosalee who couldn’t drink the spiked champagne dude was serving because she’s pregnant.

Back in the heart of Portland, it turns out that Lt. Grossante (the officer who was poised to inherit Renard’s job and killed a man with his bare hands to prove his loyalty, but got swerved by Captain-I’m-really-Nick-under-a-bodybody-spell-Renard) is the one who kidnapped Diana. Big mistake. Huge.

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So, she’s like, “I wanna go home.” So he woges and tries to scare her. [shakes head]. She starts flinging him around like a ragdoll. Firstly, she don’t have no home training. Secondly, her lack of home training comes in handy sometimes. Grossante calls Renard and begs him to come get her. Renard says that he’ll swing by eventually.

The morning after the champagne toast, each of the friends falls hopeless in love with someone: Monroe sees Eve and falls in love; Nick sees Rosalee and becomes enamored; Adalind sees Monroe and wants on; Eve sees Nick and… [this is sad, ironic, and kind of mean] professes her undying love for him; Wu sees some random waitress and is proposing; and Hank sees… himself in the mirror and is transfixed.

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Meanwhile, the waiter is laughing heartily because he tripled the dose of the spell and he knows that this is going to turn violent pretty soon. It does. They are punching and slapping and yelling at each other over who loves who and who should be with who. Rosalee figures out what happened and confronts the waiter. Antics ensue and dude takes a nosedive off of a cliff. Luckily for the gang, his death breaks the spell.

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I didn’t have to put this gif of Eve slapping Adalind in [looks directly at camera] but I wanted to.

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Back in Portland, Renard picks up Diana and leaves a broken and bleeding Grossante on the floor of an abandoned building.

So I guess that counts as a happy ending and a happy birthday.

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I have so many questions: Why aren’t Nick and Eve telling anyone about the mirror storm skull? When is someone going to quarantine Diana? How long is Eve going to look longing at Nick? How long is Nick going to love his rapist? How long until Diana figures out that Eve helped decapitate her “first” mommy? When are Monroe and Rosalee going to stop hangig out with these people?

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