I got a lot of kicks, but I don’t give a fuck, I’m in my dirty chucks”- Futuristic
Know this ’bout me from jump, I’m a Chuck Taylor guy. There is no in between for me when it comes to sneakers. I never got into Jordan’s. Didn’t get the appeal of them and all the trouble to keep’em clean. I was never a sneaker guy… but that all changed when the Will Smith box office “I, Robot” attacked. Will Smith’s character, Del Spooner, gets a delivery, sits down opens the box and get excited over this pair of Black Chuck Taylor high-tops and how they were such a retro throwback (he’s living in the future). I was eating Raisin Bran cereal and that close up got me. I know that they snatched me up with the product placement. I know it’s marketing but Bast damn. That was the coldest shit I ever saw.
From that point on it was only Chucks. Lemme tell you why I love them tho: Chuck Taylors are like a beat’em up video game. You know how in some beat’em up video games when your character is beaten up and their health bar drops to a certain level, they can do a desperation move? That’s the beauty of pair of Chucks. The more scuffed and beat up they become, the more personality the shoes have. Over time, the wear and tear on some Chucks is a visual representation of all the experience points you’ve gained. I don’t even like seeing a fresh pair out the box, I don’t even look at’em. I go out and about my day, come back home then look at all the scuffs, marks, and damage done to’em as I slowly nod and say, “Gooooooood.” to myself aloud. Personally, I’m on my third pair of Black Chuck Taylors. Rocked them shits till the soles came out like when Liu Kang beat the Harry Potter out Shang Tsung in Mortal Kombat.
There’s always been something about the look of a pair of Chuck Taylor high-tops to me. Their roots in Punk Rock. Seeing men dress up in a three-piece suit but the footwear still being Chucks. Women in some Chuck Taylors? Yes. That’s the wave (no, Steph Curry). There’s just something about’em that’s so gutta to me. Maybe it’s because I got to wear them in a corporate setting where my team didn’t have to adhere to the dress code. They always came across as a bit of a rebellion against authority, I guess? I mean as much as a product placed by a corporation for us to consume can be attributed to that but that’s another editorial. Chucks are hard to me…literally, cause they don’t have any type of support till like 2015. Walking around in them is painful around the 7th to 8th hour. They started out as basketball shoes too. What? Charles Hollis Taylor, you crazy for this one. That some real Ironman/woman shit. Plus you’re really fucked if you’re wearing a pair when it starts raining. They’re not built for that extreme weather conditions… until now.
William Evans threw a link into the slack that brought a tear to my eye. Converse made a “Winter is Coming” edition of the Chuck Taylor high-tops. Chuck Taylor can finally brave the elements. Do you know how long I been wanting this? Do you even know how many times I, nay, WE Chuck Taylor aficionados have had to brave the elements on accident when it started raining, hailing, snowing out of fucking nowhere? Those two little holes on the side of your Chucks (which are there to enable you to tighten the laces on your shoes for a snugger fit) letting in water and shit. Now you mean to tell me, we finally get deliverance in the form of Chuck Taylor boots?! They’re made out of Nubuck leather but to me translates as Knuck-if-you-Buck (boy) leather.
They got…*fist to mouth* they got an actual grip on the bottom, man I ain’t ever think I’d live to see the day my dude. I ain’t gotta be slipping and sliding no more? I ain’t gotta be careful walking over steel grates in the city no more? I can reenact Singing In the Rain and do a dance number through some puddles? We here. We here, yo. I don’t even need to see the colors, I know I want’em All Black Everything. Gimme the Chuck Taylor high-tops the same color as the ski mask Biggie Smalls was talking about. Gimme the Chuck Taylor high-tops the same color as the interior of Black Panther’s suit. I want the Chucks dipped in Black excellence! However, there are times a dude gotta be elegant. You can’t ski mask way 24/7. That being said, lemme see ones in brown… Mmmhmm… Lemme see it from the back.
*Diddy voice from come with me* Yeah, I like that. That looks like some grown-up casual right there. I can fuck with that. *Sam Wilson hand rub* These are battle ready for the elements? Well, I’ma put that to the test. I’ma get a pair of these and put’em through the same conditions as when the Fire Nation attacked. I live in New York which is basically living in Streets of Rage / Final Fight (just pipes and fully cooked turkeys laying around everywhere). You don’t come out without some part of the city trying to mess with you. I feel like I reached level 32 of my life and just got a level up with these shoes. I’m fucking with the +15 durability, +20 endurance, and +50 “stomp the shit out you” look. Yeah, I’m rolling, ain’t nothing else left to say except….