Castlevania Hit Us With The Drive-By Dopeness Over The Weekend

Look here fam, there are few titles that when mentioned instantly show your video gaming credibility from the jump. Castlevania is one of those titles. Symphony of the Night still putting numbers on the board if you got the right hardware. So when it was announced that Netflix was cracking the bullwhip on a Castlevania animated series written by gawd scribe Warren Ellis, you know the nerd streets was talking bout this shit. Since Ellis has written so many things that have translated well to the screen (Red, Iron Man: Extremis, Trees in development), then him writing a show felt like going straight to the source. It also meant, if you know Ellis’ work, this shit was going to be dark. But yo, we talkin’ bout fuckin’ Dracula my monster hunter, so you knew what this was.

Speaking of which, the show begins showing Dracula, having withdrawn from the human world and lined his driveway with the most morbid of holiday cheer (read: lots of fuckin’ skulls). When Lisa Teppes dares to enter Dracula’s home in search of knowledge, never showing any fear for the vampire, Dracula finally indulges her, then presumptably falls in love with her. When the church accuses Lisa of witchcraft (with the predictable sentence), its fair to say that Dracula is fed the fuck up. He wasn’t even fuckin’ with you humans anyway, man. He promises to take his wrath out on the world in a year’s time for their crimes and ain’t nobody ever call Dracula a liar, b.

The biggest crime of Castlevania is that it’s only…