Game of Thrones Recap: Dragonstone

Season: 7 / Episode: 1 / HBO ***Spoilers be arriving by sea, serving looks and not saying a damn thing.*** Maaaaaaaaan, you know when Thrones do the cold open that indeed, some cold shit bout to go down. We spent all this time waiting for Thrones to come back and we start this shit at the Twins. At literal fuckboi central with the bastard/incest Freys. Which is just like all the other incest kingdoms except not as pretty. Walder having another feast for his peoples, so either this is a flashback or… Walder addressing his folks, giving them second breakfast and shit, to celebrate holding down the Riverlands. He raises a toast but these muthafuckas should’ve known something was off cuz they all drinking Arbor Gold and you know these smelly-lookin’ bastards ain’t got champagne palette like that. Basically, if Jay-Z has rapped about it, it’s out of your price range, Freys. After everybody gets their sip on, he starts congratulating them on bringing down the Starks, but then that shit got way too specific. Good job on killing the Starks! (Cheer) Butchered a woman who was with child! (Uh, yeaaaah) Slit the throat of a mother of 5 children! (Ok, that wasn’t me but…) Slaughtered the guests you invited into your home. (So, I feel like there’s a turn coming and maybe I should stop cheering) By the time Walder get to the part about not all the Starks being dead, these “my daddy is my great granddaddy too” muthafuckas start keeling over, spitting up their stomach lining and shit. Leave…