Top 5 Dead or Alive: Pam Poovey (Archer)

Archer has no shortage of characters that are both funny as all hell and are world beating assholes. That dysfunctional spy agency got more drama than Shondaland Thursdays. Over six seasons the CIA contracted group formerly known as a drug cartel formerly known as ISIS, everybody has gotten their time to shine, but for me, Pam Poovey aka The White Pumpkin aka Chupacara (for sex) gotta be Top Five Dead or Alive.

1). “Hit the gym for two weeks, my back all chiseled. Elbows unique now, meet the new me.” In the pilot episode of Archer, there’s a flashback scene where Sterling straight up assaulted Pam (voiced by the incredible Amber Nash) with a stuffed dolphin. Sterling beat Pam down to the white meat with a miniature version of one the world’s smartest mammals, fam.

Fast forward to Pam taking the Field Test exam which produced, as Krieger put, “soul crushing” video of Pam going Cloverfield on everyone. That shit looked like Blair Witch project meets [insert hate crime here]. I can only assume that once the cameras cut off, what followed was some Grodd go loose on Central City type shit. But by the time that episode happens in season four, we already knew the deal because of #2.

2). “And one n!!!!a done took his shirt off talkin’ about, now who else wanna fuck with Hollywood Cole!?”

Pam been living a double life (though not in secret) where she’s the HR director for Spy Agency (ok that part is supposed to be secret) and street brawler at night. In the episode where she gets…